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The Adventures of Queen Gemma and Friends

Written by Renee Tremble
Tuesday, 24 August 2010 08:50

Italy continued...

Our trip to the Amalfi coast was...an adventure. We knew the bed and breakfast we were staying at was far away from, well, anywhere, so Giovanna had arranged for the owners to pick us up at the train station. We just had to get off the train and call them, it didn't sound so hard. But of course it was. We got off at the wrong stop (but didn't know it,) and could barely understand them when we called them because their English was so limited. We waited over an hour (we thought they were gonna be there in 30 mins,) before calling them again. It was then we discovered our mistake, and they insisted that we go to the next station and call them again. At this point we were so frustrated we were ready to give up and find a new place to stay, but our reservation couldn't be cancelled. We got to the new station and called them, but they proceeded to hang up on us. We were quite upset, but then a really cute guy approached us and we figured we could use him to translate. Our mistake, turned out the hottie and his friend were there to pick us up. All previous issues were immediately forgotten.

The ride up the massive, steep hills to the very top of the coast was intimidating and crazy. We talked with our new friends the whole way, and they invited us for dinner. Obviously we agreed.

We couldn't believe our eyes when we arrived at our B&B, the view was one of the most incredibly amazing places I have ever seen. The sky and the sea coast literally melted together, to the point where you could hardly tell where one ended and the other began. We were outside of the small town to the point where it felt like our own private house. I could've stayed there alllll day long and been happy. However, we were eager to get to the beach so we quickly changed into swimsuits, filled water bottles with wine, and headed down via the bus. The route down was even more incredible then the trip up, though kind of scary. The roads were as narrow as they could possibly be, and the bus driver wasted no time speeding around the corners. Alas we made it, and spend the afternoon swimming in the most crystal clear, beautiful water imaginable. Laying on the beach and soaking up the sun, I couldn't think of anything more perfect than where I was. Every second I reminded myself of how lucky I was, and not to take the moment for granted.

After a long, relaxing day on the beach we headed back to change and meet our cute boys for dinner. We got there and there was only one, but he took us to a great local pizza joint and treated us to amazing food and sangria. He also told us how much money he makes and showed us his Dolce and Gabbana boxer briefs not once, not twice, but three times. When we finished eating he drove us to some cliff to show us a "view," and what a view it was. It looked out over Amalfi and Positano, and it was dark at this piont so the small cities were lit up. However, this is when things took a very bizzarre turn. He kept putting his arm around Ashley and calling her his "Queen," so we decided it was time to move on. We convinced him to take us to a bar, but a few minutes later we "conventiently" pulled up to a random road where two of his friends were waiting. They hopped in the car next to us and we continued to the next "view." This view was not nearly so special, it conisisted of...a fence and a tree. And nothing else. Three guys, three girls, and a deserted parking lot, awesome. They immediately paired themselves off with the three of us, and my guy kept calling me Queen Gemma, because I was a "beautiful diamond." Ashley's guy continued calling her his queen, even after finding out she has a serious boyfriend, and by the time we convinced them to take us home, all 3 of us had been proposed to with the promise of an amazing life on the Amalfi Coast. Tempting, but we passed.

We got home and just wanted to sit outside and enjoy the riciculously amazing view, but the boys wouldn't have it. Mine was especially aggressive, even after I turned away, told him he was making me very uncomfortable, and pretended to be asleep. I gave up and went to bed, the girls followed me shortly.

The next morning we got up early and went back to the beach. There was nowhere in the World I would rather be, and we made the most of our last day in beautiful Italy. None of us had even the slightest desire to return to Prague, and that's when we realized how ridiculous spoiled we are. How many people in the US would complain about having to go to Prague, one of the most beautiful old cities in the world?? That's what living in Europe does to you I guess.

After debating our options for returning to Naples, we decided to take a ferry to Sorrento where we could catch a bus straight to the airport. I for one had no desire to see anymore of Naples, I'd had quite enough at that point and was still pretty bitter about my camera. The ferry to Sorrento was amazing of course, and the town beautiful. However we were REALLY short on time, and spent the next half hour in frantic search of a bus which didn't seem to exist. Luckily someone finally pointed us in the right direction, and we made it in the nick of time.

Just like that, we were on the airplane headed back to Prague, and our much anticipated long weekend in Italy was over. All good things must come to an end sometime, but...there are plenty more holiday adventure weekends awaiting us in the coming months:)

 

Queen Gemma Meets the Moped Mafia

Written by Renee Tremble
Monday, 23 August 2010 11:20

Feeling in desperate need of a sunny, relaxing, beachy holiday, my friends and I booked a 5 day flight to Naples, Italy a few months ago. It was my idea, and though I knew Naples didn't exactly have the best of reputations, I was so enticed by the cheap flights and beaches that I didn't care. And besides, we were only planning on spending a day or two of the holiday actually in Naples, so how bad could it be? Considering my history with travels I don't know why I thought I could just have a normal holiday...

Things started off quite smoothly. We had a hostel reserved in Naples for four nights, followed by one night on the Amalfi Coast before returning to Prague. We actually found our hostel with little difficulty, and it was a really nice place. The owner was an older man who lived at the hostel and devoted his life to it, it was like we were staying in his house...he was so nice, helpful and protective that we nicknamed him "Daddy Giovanni." The first night he warned us about thieves, showed us multiple videos of people getting robbed, and literally would not let us out of the hotel with our purses. I was really irritated...afterall, I've lived in Europe for a year and a half and traveled all over with no issues, why should this be any different? Alas, Giovanni insisted I put my money in my bra (because I was wearing a dress with no pockets,) and I was so afraid of it falling out that I checked every 5.5 seconds to make sure it was still there. We set out for a fabulous Italian meal with lots of wine, then went in search of the beaches we had heard so much about. We got lost in the ports, wandered around aimlessly, ended up at a ten mile long tunnel and finally admitted defeat. We got home at around 11 pm to a very panicked Daddy Giovanni, who was worried that "the spice girls" as he deemed us, had gotten lost. We settled in to bed, all the while plotting how we were going to get out with our purses in the morning.

We all failed, and I resorted to carrying my debit card inside my camera case, which I wrapped securely around my wrist. At a coffee shop that morning, the server pointedly told me that I needed to actually hold it in my hand. So of course I listened to him...

We spent that day exploring Naples (which is far from my favorite city in Italy,) searching for beaches to swim on (we failed,) and eating ridiculous amount of amazing, cheap food. (Naples might be the Detroit of Europe, but it does have really good, really cheap food.) We had already planned a trip to the Isle of Capri for the next day, so we were planning on taking it easy that night and going to bed early. We went to a nice restaurant for dinner, drank wine, and flirted with the server. On the way back we stopped for gelato, and made it back to our hostel at around 10 pm. We were standing outside eating and talking while my friend dug out the key, when out of nowhere someone grabbed my arm and starting pulling me. I thought I was being kidnapped and fought until something snapped and flung me in a circle. As I saw the straps go flying, I realized my camera had just fallen victim to the "Italian Moped Mafia." Two men on a moped/motorcycle (I couldn't see it, I don't know...) drove up behind me, reached around, and grabbed my wrist/camera. To add insult to the injury, they managed to rip a hole in my favorite tank top in the process. It was two days into a holiday I had been anticipating for months, and I no longer had a camera or a debit card. Or any money. I had to mooch off my roomies for the rest of the holiday, and resort to using their cameras if I wanted to take a picture. I cried myself to sleep that night, spend the next morning spending hundreds of crowns calling the US to cancel my debit card, and got over it all when we boarded the ferry for the Isle of Capri.

I took a 3 week tour of 10 European countries when I was 15, and the Isle of Capri always stood out as one of the highlights. I had built it up in my mind and to my friends, but somehow, it was even better than I remembered. The water was so beautiful, the brightest, deepest blue you can imagine. Pictures do it NO justice. We took a two hour private boat tour around the island, and got to go swimming. In the green grotto...amazing. We spent the rest of the day walking around the serenely beautiful island, swimming in the beautiful warm water, and of course eating more good food. When the time came to leave, I debated jumping off the ferry so I could stay behind. Shortly after our departure, a massive lightning storm kicked in across the Mediterranean. It was dusk and lightning zigzagged continually across the sky. A bizarre cloud reached from the sea all the way up to the clouds floating high above the surface. It wasn't until a mild frenzy created by some of the other passengers that we realized the "cloud" was actually a water tornado. We were fascinated by it, and watched it the whole way home. Daddy Giovanni informed us that it had been all over the news because it was such a rare occurrence. Ashley took about 500 pictures of it, but none of them turned out. Only my camera had the zoom to capture it, and who knows where my camera is these days.

We got back, drank some wine (shocking I know,) and were talking with Daddy Giovanni when he asked Ashley if she wanted to step outside for a moment, and to bring her camera. An hour later she still wasn't back, and I went to bed. I was fast asleep when she finally returned soaking wet after 1 am. Turns out Daddy Giovanni took her for a two hour motorcycle ride around Naples in the rain. Shockingly enough, her camera did not survive the trip and also fell victim to the Naples camera Gods. Two days into our trip, and we went from three cameras to one. It was now all on Gash, who is notorious for taking as many ridiculous, crazy pictures as possible.

Day number 3 of our trip was devoted to Mt. Vesuvius and Pompeii. We were dressed really appropriately in summer dresses and sandals, why wouldn't you wear that to hike up a mountain? It was an amazing hike though and we had a great time, even if we had to walk with excessive caution to avoid falling/sliding down the volcano. Ashley and Gash kept talking about how it looked like the Lord of the Rings...I've heard of the movie but have no idea what it's about. I didn't understand what they were talking about.

From Mt. Vesuvius they took us straight to Pompeii. As it was rather expensive and we had both seen it before, Gash and I opted out and left Ashley to explore it by herself. We went to a little tourist restaurant to drink soda and chill. The restaurant had Europe's cheapest Coke Light, so we ordered a two liter bottle. Of course it was half frozen, and a third of it exploded out when we opened the bottle. The next third was good, the final third was watery and gross by the time it thawed. Of course we can't even order a soda and have it be normal. During this time we flirted it up with our server, who happened to be from the Ukraine. He invited us to hang out with him the next day but we said we were heading to the Amalfi Coast. We invited him to come to Naples that night, and he said he would with a friend of his. Ashley finally made her way back (she was the only one appropriately dressed for the day in cotton shorts and a t-shirt,) and we introduced her to our friend and said he would be taking us "out on the town" that night. He looked at her and asked if she had anything nicer to wear. She said she didn't, cause she's a bum. He asked "what is bum?" and I responded "it means she sleeps on the street." For some reason Ashley felt in necessary to clarify that she only sleeps on the street, she doesn't work on the street.

We headed back to our hostel in Naples to make a cheap dinner with the intention of meeting up with our new Ukrainian boyfriends. We found really cheap wine, so we bought a few bottles and were innocently drinking when Daddy Giovanni told us how to work the phone, and said that if anyone came we should buzz them in and call him. He then kidnapped Gash, apparently it was her turn for a ride. Ashley and I proceeded to get pretty happy while finishing the wine, when the door rang...uh oh, someone was here. After hitting every button imaginable I finally managed to buzz her in, and called Giovanni immediately. It took him a solid hour to get back, so for an hour we struggled to entertain this girl (who only wanted water to drink,) while under the influence of a bottle and half of wine each.

I went to bed shortly after they returned, because we were planning on heading to the Amalfi Coast at the crack of dawn. We got up at 7 with the intention of leaving at 8, but I hadn't had my motorcycle ride yet...no fears though, Giovanni found me at 7:30 and kidnapped me for a "short" ride. it probably lasted an hour and a half, but it was amazing and so worth it. We stopped for coffee at his favorite cafe, and it was delicious. Flying around the streets of Naples on a BMW motorcycle, and the beautiful views from the top of the city, are an experience I won't soon forget.

To be continued with the Amalfi Coast/Queen Gemma tales...

 

A Year and A Half?!

Written by Renee Tremble
Saturday, 14 August 2010 12:18

A year and a half...18 months...548 days...no matter how you put it, the number seems way too high to accurately describe the time I have spent in Prague. I simply cannot believe I have been here this long, the time has flown by SO fast. But when I look back over everything that's happened...it seems like I've been here so much longer. In a year and a half, I have...

~obtained 4 visas (well #4 is pending, I'll find out in a couple weeks if it was successful)
~been legally employed at 3 different places
~somehow ended up in budapest when trying to get from bratislava to prague (200 miles in the opposite direction...)
~wandered around train tracks near Ceske Budejovice because I got off at the wrong stop
~moved 3 times
~had a visa trip to Dresden fail miserably solely because my criminal background check was not translated into Czech
~fallen asleep on the night tram countless times
~had 15 roommates
~had a trip to oktoberfest nearly end in a trip to the german jail
~had a roommate mysteriously vanish the day before rent was due along with my 10,500 crown rent payment for the month
~traveled to Slovakia (X 4), Germany (X 5), Austria (X 2) Italy, (X 2) Spain, Amsterdam, Sweden, Hungary, and countless Czech cities (with upcoming holidays planned to Poland, Slovenia, Croatia, Bosnia and Serbia)
~gotten the worst case of food poisoning ever from a "100% beef, American-style hamburger"
~seen Obama speak at the Prague castle
~gotten robbed in Italy by the "moped mafia," who viciously ripped my camera and debit card off my wrist.
~"lost" my purse at the US embassy
~taken my mom to one of my classes with me which resulted in a hangover so bad she could barely make it to Italy the next day
~been laughed at hysterically by the airport personal for no good reason when trying to get a car jump started
~consumed approximately 650,000 bottles of wine and beer
~made friends with Russian/German boys who wrote "sex bomb" across my chest
~had 3 core "best friend" groups as people come and go...and I stay.
~fallen off a raft, resulting in horrible bruises all over my body
~participated in the "metro olympics:" 13 metro stops, 1 half liter beer at every stop. on Easter Sunday. I gave up ONE stop before the end, after drinking two extra beers and a shot.

 

~met Jean-Claude Van Damme at a restaurant that we stopped at for beer and had my picture taken with him
~got so drunk at a TEFL graduation party that my friend and fellow employee had to carry me home and spend 45 minutes unlocking my door
~missed a bus to Cesky Krumlov because we spent 15 minutes starting at the departures board wondering the time had changed, only to realize we were looking at arrivals
~flown back to the US three times, had my luggage lost in transit 3 times
~gotten lost/missed my transportation so many times that my friends are afraid to travel with me
~experience the World cup in Europe
~went back to Wisconsin for 3 weeks to wait tables so I could afford to stay here

Sometimes I wonder how I've survived so long, and I can't wait to see what I'll be adding to this list when I hit the two year mark!

   

Amsterdam

Written by Renee Tremble
Tuesday, 27 July 2010 10:20

July 5th and 6th are always national holidays in the Czech Republic, and lately those days have been nicely coinciding with July 4th to give us Americans a long holiday weekend. I took advantage of it this year to meet a good friend from my TEFL course, (who was living in Ireland but has since moved to Mexico,) in Amsterdam. It was my first time going, so I was pretty excited for a long weekend there. We were both in need of a somewhat relaxing weekend, so we had booked a private cabin/hostel on a lake about 20 km outside of city. My plane landed in Amsterdam at around 17:00, a whole 15 mintues after the Netherlands unexpectedly beat Brazil in the quarter finals of the world cup. Needless to say, insanity resulted from the moment I got off the plane.

I easily found my friend Lurissa (who had arrived a day earlier,) and after getting over the excitement of our long-awaited reunion, we headed downtown to partake in the festivities. We stopped at a pub to eat traditional (and extremely unhealthy) Dutch food and drink beer. Without even trying we made friends with a group of crazy, very high, poor English speaking German men. We got bored with them when we realized they had questionable intentions in talking to us, and I was tempted to make up a boyfriend. I probably should have. We managed to get them away from us, had a few more beers, and headed to our hostel relatively early. On the way we decided to pick up a couple of bottles of wine to last us for the weekend...

Our hostel was really cool, I was impressed. We had this cute little cabin, there were multiple common areas, and an outdoor kitchen with festive multi-colored lights. Lurissa and I cracked open one of the bottles of wine and attempted to catch up on the year that had passed since we both lived in Prague. Before we knew it, it was 3 am and both bottles of wine were empty. Time for bed, our 9am wake up call would arrive way too soon.

We spent the majority of the next day exploring Amsterdam via the "hop on hop off" boat sightseeing cruise. I fell in love with Amsterdam, it's a beautiful city. The canals are endless and the architecture is so unique. Early that evening we did a Heineken Brewery Tour, which was much more entertaining than I thought possible. It was more of a self-guided museum tour, and we entertained ourselves by taking countless silly pictures and laughing at ourselves. After eating a lot more delicious Dutch food and having a few beers, we ended the night early. The next day, the 4th of July, was reserved for the beach. There was an island near our hostel, and we spent the majority of the day lying on the beautiful beach. It was so nice to see sand again, and actually be surrounded by water! The Vltava just doesn't cut it...

Later that evening we decided to venture into town in search of an expat bar. We asked the hostel shuttle girl, who was British, if she knew any. She said she did not and asked why we wanted to go to one. We said we wanted to celebrate Independence Day, and she asked if I was an independent woman. I decided to drop it. We failed at finding an expat bar, but we created our own 4th of July pub crawl. I was wearing a tight, low cut tank top, one I often wear in Prague. I don't get attention from it here, it's like men don't notice I exist. In Amsteram I got 10 comments in a couple of hours. It's a whole other world and something I am no longer used to. It almost felt like being back in the US. One guy actually invited us on his boat. I debated momentarily, but he was old. And a little creepy.

Speaking of other worlds, I made Lurissa take me to the red light district. It was bizarre, and made me feel slightly uncomfortable/uneasy. There's something disturbing about watching overly made up, skinny girls standing in a window waiting for a guy to chose her. It was cool to see once, but I really dont need to go back again. I left wondering what happened in those girls' lives to possess them to take up such a career. I'll stick with teaching English.

You might wonder about the lack of coffee shops mentioned in this post...that's because I didn't go to one. Yeah you read that right, I went to Amsterdam and didn't smoke a thing. Because Lurissa was moving to Mexico a couple of weeks after, we decided it would be best to avoid them. I guess I have a good excuse to go back:)

 

Camping-Czech Style

Written by Renee Tremble
Wednesday, 21 July 2010 14:23

One of the reasons I decided to stay in Prague after my first year is because I hadn't done much traveling at that point, and I had a strong desire to travel Europe before I left. I've made up for that lack of travel and then some this summer. I'm going to attempt to backtrack and write about all the crazy weekends we've had, but I'll start with the most recent.

Last weekend my friends and I wanted to get out of the city, but we wanted it to be cheap and relaxing. We found a cabin located...well, somewhere in the Czech Republic...on a Czech website and reserved it for the weekend. And by "reserved" I mean I sent an email with my name, and they said that's all they needed. The cost for four of us to spend two nights in this cabin was roughly 60 USD, and we had no idea where we were going. We were skeptical to say the least. We took the bus to a well known Czech city, Karolvy Vary, were we would transfer to a city bus for the last 20km of the trip. We had intended to go grocery shopping in Karlovy Vary but only had 15 minutes, so we chose to make a frantic beer/vodka run instead. We each cracked open a beer on the city bus, and "cheers-ed" with the local Czechs who spoke not a word of English and laughed at us the whole time.

We got to the campground where the cabin was located with surprisingly little difficulty, and were actually impressed with what we got. The check in consisted of showing the lady my confirmation email, and then I was given a key. At this point I had the key to our cabin, and they had...my name and email; nothing else. The campground area was nice, we had a typical cabin in a very quiet, very family friendly neighborhood. We decided we might have to tame down our typical Friday night. We spent that night exploring the area and chilling by the campfire, where we made friends with some Czech guys who spoke questionable English at best. We showed them how to roast marshmallows, and they asked us where "crazy Americans come up with such things." They really like them though, and ate more than we did. They also drank our beer (we had a 6 pack of 1.5 L bottles, so there was plenty to go around.) The night was fun, but we ended it early in order to be well-rested for our much anticipated rafting trip the next day. Our friends invited us to go rafting with them, and even came back to get us in morning. However, they informed us they didn't have room in their raft, and that they were actually continuing on to their next camp many kms down the river, but gave us their email address so we could "plan an action." I guess they want to see us again.

We set off on our camp-supplied rafting trip complete with multipe bottles of vodka lemonade for each of us. (One might think mixing rafting and vodka is not such a good idea, but take the term "rafting" lightly here...we were more or less floating down a lazy river on a raft, with some occasional paddling.) Not one km into the trip we found a beer garden pit stop, which of course we had to stop at. When we were getting off my friend fell in the water and I laughed at her. On the way back in the boat, I fell and got covered in mud. Karma's a bitch. And that was only the begining.

 

By this point the drinks were flowing quite freely, and we soon ran into a canoe of Czech men calling out for help...turns out their friends had stolen their paddles as a joke and left them stranded. We happily allowed them to hold on to our raft and went off in search of their friends. Obviously, their friends were certainly not expecting them to arrive with a group full of American girls. For the rest of the trip, the two canoes full of Czech men stayed with us, holding on to our raft and such. We made more beer garden trips, finished our vodka, bought ginormous 1.5 liter soda bottles full of beer...you can picture where this is going. Yup, I fell off the boat. And couldn't get back on. Eventually I managed with the help of everyone on the raft, and I still have massive bruises as a result of being pulled along the vary shallow, rocky water. At first I regretted this, but the pictures are more than worth it. When we were getting out of the boat at the end of the trip I fell again, and once more needed to be rescued.

 

We went back to the campsite after rafting, grilled hotdogs and made smores, hung out with our Czech friends...and for some reason I passed out reallly early. My friends say they had fun jumping on the trampoline, playing kickball, singing by the fire, and who knows what else. The Czech guys kept asking my friends where "The Renee was" and tried to wake me up multiple times, but I really needed my beauty rest. I don't know why they added an article before my name, I guess I was important to them:)

The next day we slept in and relaxed, and then took one of two bus options back to Karlovy Vary. One of my friends was really struggling at functioning, so we took it pretty easy. We explored the city for a few hours, had our first meal in nearly two days that didn't consist of bread and cheese, and then made our way back to Prague.

On the bus on the way to the cabin, we had deemed this the "no rules" weekend. The weekend definitely lived up to it's name...

   
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